Singing the Blues

                 

Singing the Blues

Here is a song that describes how I have been Feeling:

Everyday I Have The Blues
B.B. King

Everyday, everyday I have the blues
Ooh everyday, everyday I have the blues
When you see me worryin' baby, yeah it's you I hate to lose
Whoa nobody loves me, nobody seems to care
Whoa nobody loves me, nobody seems to care
Well worries and trouble darling, babe you know I've had my share
Everyday, everyday, everyday, everyday
Everyday, everyday I have the blues
When you see me worryin' baby, yeah it's you I hate to lose
Whoa nobody loves me, nobody seems to care
Whoa nobody loves me, nobody seems to care
Well worries and trouble darling, babe you know I've had my share

                                                                             {Thanks to Google :)


                     So this past month has been a little hard for me. I am not one to complain but it has been a little hard on me. I realize that Heavenly Father would never give me a trial or anything I can't handle. I find myself not wanting to do much and singing the blues. We have had a crazy month for being sick. It's crazy. It started off with Rayna having a fever for 24 hours. This was her only symptom and it was too high for her to be teething. Once this one symptom went away we were so glad. We were afraid that she might be getting Hand, Foot and Mouth disease. Thankfully she never got it. Then on Monday I thought I better take her in to the Dr just to make sure that she was okay. a few days latter she came down with the flu. Great. Least we got a little break. She got it on Wednesday. It is so hard to see your child sick and helpless. Not to mention suffering because they are so hungry.  By Friday she was eating again and better. Then Saturday after Jeff's marathon she threw up all over the car. That was not so fun. So she was back to just drinking Gatorade and eating crackers.
                 Then the fun really began. I got sick. Sunday morning it was my turn. I was sick until Wednesday. It is crazy how much being sick can take out of you. I realized how much I did not want to do around the house. I found myself turning on the TV for Rayna. This is something I don't believe in. I don't like Rayna watching TV. (I am not opposed if it's something you think is alright or if you do). I just know that it's harmful to children under 2.  I realized that it's not fun chasing a 15 month old around when your throwing up. It's the last thing that you want to do. TRUST ME! Thursday was the first day I wanted to get up and do something. Trust me I did. I cleaned the house and did laundry. I sanitized everything! Then I got ready for our trip to Montana for Memorial day.
                   Rayna started throwing up again on our trip in Montana on Sunday night. Poor baby. :( It was back to seeing her starve. IT was a little harder seeing her sick while we were traveling. She did amazing though. I am not sure if she got the flu again or if she just ate too much and played to hard before bed. She got better by Tuesday though. You think we would be immune to the flu by now right? Think again. By Friday night Rayna threw up again. This time we were in Emmett spending time with Jeff's family. I couldn't help but think why again? Haven't we had enough of the flu? I am getting sick of puke. She slept fine and on Saturday she ate like nothing again. It is really hard for Jeff to see her sick and hungry.
                  Saturday morning I could tell that I wasn't feeling very well. Like I was getting sick. I couldn't  help but think NOOOOOOOO!!! Sure enough I got the flu again. I thought that I was out of the clear and not going to get it this time around. Luckily Jeff only felt sick this last week. That has been a blessing. Sunday Rayna threw up again. But she still ate dinner. I am beginning to notice a coincidence when she has been throwing up. I am beginning to think that she might not have the flu each time she has been sick. I might be wrong though. I am no Dr. She has just thrown up once three different times. Each time she had eaten a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. It might not mean anything but we are avoiding them for awhile and see if her random puking stops. Maybe she just has a hard time digesting the peanut butter. Who knows what's the real problem.
                I am feeling so much better. I am still not 100% myself but I feel like I can get up and take care of Rayna and Jeff. That's what is important. I am still trying to get my house clean again though. Its a long process when you are sick and get behind on your chores. Especially the laundry. I feel like I may never get caught up.

                    I am so thankful for Jeff! I am thankful that even though we have been sick a lot lately we have come closer together as a family. I am daily falling in love with him over and over again. I am so glad that he found me! Also that we can be together forever! Jeff has been such a big help with Rayna while I have been sick. It has made it so much more bearable. I am so thankful that he is willing to be so helpful while I was not feeling so nice. I am glad that through all of this flu business that I was able to find perspective and realize that I should be thankful that we just had the flu and nothing worse. We are all able to get better and won't be ever changed from having it. On another positive note I lost 7lbs the first time I got the flu. Which makes me at pre pregnancy weight. I can't wait to weigh myself after being sick the last time. I can tell I have lost some more weight. I do not recommend this form of weight loss that's for sure.

Here is another song that helped me through the tough month:

This is a part of Stronger by Kelly Clarkson

What doesn't kill you makes you strongerStand a little tallerDoesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm aloneWhat doesn't kill you makes you fighterFootsteps even lighterDoesn't mean I'm over 'cause you're gone